Have you been touched by His noodly appendage?
Brothers and sisters, welcome to the wonderful world of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism. It is not religion, although some of its practices and beliefs may appear so, it is a scientific theory, which its proponents demand to be thought at school, side by side with the theories of Evolution, Intelligent Design and Intelligent Falling.
Key points of the theory:
- An invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe, starting with a mountain, trees and a “midgit” (sic).
- All evidence pointing towards evolution was intentionally planted by this being
- Global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct consequence of the decline in numbers of pirates since the 1800s.
As you can see it is all undeniable fact, and as an supporting argument, a sum of $1′000′000 is offered to anyone who can produce empirical evidence proving that Jesus is not the son of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (although Jesus is not a part of, or worshipped in, Flying Spaghetti Monsterism).
Ramen to that!
